Narrator: You will find our story populated with a variety of interesting characters. Like Jonas. Jonas!
Something startled me out of a sound sleep, the first one I've had in a long time. My sleep doctor says I have sleep apnea, but he doesn't have a clue how to fix it. He's given me a variety of machines that are supposed to help me sleep, and they do help some, but I still wake up a lot. So a restful night is a rare occurrence, and very not my first choice for being startled out of. I could swear I heard my name, but looking around I can't see who would have called it. The only souls for miles around (aside from the abundant native wildlife) are me, my Wheaton terrier Barnaby, and my Trikke. (Which you mightn't think would be alive. It is!)
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